Tuesday, 25 April 2017

Ground rules for dating- by Kolawole Emmanuel

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Read his piece below....

Before you make any kind of marital commitment, get to know this woman well. Get to be friends first, then developed the relationship.

When you met, both of you responded on an emotional level, you were attracted to each other like magnets, in spite of your differences. Dating gives you the opportunity to deliberately assess her merits, if she is good enough for you.

Get to interact and fellowship with her on a spiritual, mental, psychological and emotional level. Intimacy on these levels must be worked at if you want your relationship to succeed.
Remember that you have your own life to live. Don't plan your whole life around this woman until she has shown you total commitment. You should therefore plan your outings.
Avoid unscheduled outings that clash with your own plans. Call her ahead of time to inform her of your intentions. If she drops in unscheduled, try and accommodate her because she could feel rejected if you don't attend to her. Tell her to call you whenever she wants to come and see you at your office or apartment. You may have other appointments already scheduled for that time.
You must study her to know who she is. Test her to know if she keeps her word and if she really committed to you. You must however not major on her weaknesses but on her strengths. Can you spend the rest of your life with her, the way she is, in spite of her weaknesses?
Your business is your business until you prove her integrity. Don't tell her everything about yourself until she proves her commitment to you.
No joint accounts please. Maintain your account. Keep your own money until you get to know her, even then, be very discreet in your financial affairs, you are not yet married.
Don't act paranoid. Not every man you see with her wants to have relationship with her. You must realize that before you came into the picture, she had some friends in her life.
Don't always table and discuss her with your friends if you want your relationship to grow and lead to marriage. Learn to be discrete.
Don't spend money on her in an attempt to win her over. What you will create is a woman who is committed to you because of your money. Love cannot be bought with money. Give her love time and room to grow. Don't try to buy it, force it or emotionally coerce it out of her. The way you got her love, is the way you will maintain it. A woman wants to feel loved, and secure. If you don't make her feel that way, another man gladly will and she will most probably end up with him.

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